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Today I was on iTunes browsing for some new podcasts to listen to. “What’s a podcast,” you may ask. Bitch, please I do not have the time.
I was in the comedy section, and there I find a podcast called Throwing Shade. Sold. I don’t even need to know what it’s about.
So the hosts of the podcast were talking about an article from Slate called Is Rachel Dratch too ugly for Hollywood? It’s written by a deplorable slag called Torie Bosch. I’m not going to link to it, because as I commented she is a DEPLORABLE SLAG.
The article got me thinking: when was the last time I called someone ugly? I couldn’t recall, and I think it’s simply because I don’t besmirch people on their physical looks.
Don’t get me wrong. I can be such a cunt. Some of the things that I say can be quite vicious and degrading. However none of my degradations are based on physicality.
I will read a bitch for their fashion choices. I will throw shade at someone for being a lummox. I will call your ass out for being a promiscuous gutter-butt. None of which are formed on someone’s beauty, gender, sexual orientation, race, or age.
I may be a nasty twat, but I don’t make fun of people for the things they cannot change! I choose to be mean about other people’s behavior. Is it wrong? Yeah, probably. Yet I feel like it isn’t as bad as making fun of someone for the way they were born.
Betty Boo is constipated. Meh.
Girl, preach!
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This one time someone tried to take my dragons, and I was like “NO!” I bet you dollars to doughnuts that was the last time they tried to mop someone’s dragons. Sho’ nuff.
(via lokiodinson)
“I noticed that my opponent is always on the go
And won’t go slow so as not to focus, and I notice
He’ll hitch a ride with any guide
As long as they go fast from whence he came
But he’s no good at being uncomfortable, so
He can’t stop staying exactly the same”
— Fiona Apple, Extraordinary Machine
“Men are the most horrible creatures, honey. They will ruin your life. Mark my words.” —
Ouiser Boudreaux, Steel Magnolias: A compendium of life lessons, bitch.
#ThingsMsOuiserTaughtMe
“I know I will never be happy but I know I can be gay!” —
Marilyn Monroe
Girl, preach.